Debated...

I have debated about posting this for a while because I didn't want everyone thinking I'm a terrible mother, but I decided I've always told it as it is and I wanted these stories written down so I could remember them accurately before they get exaggerated through time.  Just a side note, these pictures are from this last week when the babies were fresh from a tubby, and these stories happened a couple of months ago.  

{Jack: shy around strangers, but a total ham at home.}

When the twins first started getting mobile I went about the usual baby proofing of the house: putting up a gate above the stairs, plugs in the outlets, dangerous things out of reach, cupboards locked....but I forgot about the garbage can.  One day the babies had scavenged out some straws of the very accessible garbage.  I didn't think much of it because they loved to drink out of cups, so they were just playing with them.  I was cleaning up lunch and they were wandering around the upstairs.  Maggie and Sam had been playing downstairs and had been running through the kitchen off and on.  After I got done, I headed to my room and noticed the bathroom was open again...something we were starting to have to be very careful of because the babies are attracted to the toilet water like crazy.  I remember thinking, "oh crap, they've left it open again......." then I noticed both Jack and Josh were hunched over the toilet with the straws in the water.  As I ran in I noticed the water was yellow!!!  "Noooooo!," I yelled at them, and they both looked up at me and laughed out loud!  Little farts!  That was when I really new that I was in BIG trouble with these mobile little stinky boys.  Needless to say, the garbage is now safely tucked behind the gate and out of reach and the kids are now religious about making sure the bathroom door is shut, especially when we have visitors who don't have to worry about this at their homes!  {Just for clarification...I can't be positive that they actually drank pee, but it was definitely highly suspicious!}

 My next story proves that I deserve the mother of the year award...completely sarcastic!!!

 About a month after the straw incident, Kendall informed me that the young men would be stopping by to sing us a song for a scavenger hunt.  So after dinner I started doing a quick tidy up before they showed up.  Once again, Sam and Maggie were doing their thing, and this time the babies were following me around the front room as I put away stray toys and shoes.  I had just gotten the vacuum out when I heard Maggie run as fast as she could into the bathroom and slam the door...a pretty common occurrence.  She likes to leave it to the last minute!  I started vacuuming, and Josh was pushing his cart around behind me.  All of a sudden I hear a gagging sound and I turn and see Jack walking toward me as fast as his wobbly legs would let him.   {this next part is not for the squeamish}  He is squishing something in his hands and I look at him and realize that it's poo!!!  Then I'm thinking  to myself oh please, please, please do not have eaten it!!!

{Josh: social little charmer, but more reserved at home. He likes to watch everything that's going on, just like his daddy.}

 Oh yes, I look at his face and see a CHOCOLATE COLORED MUSTACHE OF POO all around his mouth and he is still gagging! 


So as quick as I possibly could I scooped him up...remember, Josh is right on our heels and I don't want him to get a hold of any of the poo, grab a wet wipe and swipe the dropped poo off the tile, then swipe his mouth with a new wipe.  I then scrubbed his hands and brushed his teeth.  Believe me I thought about chloroxing his mouth because that's what I cleaned the floor with, but settled for brushing his mouth out with toothpaste!  Talk about disgusting...that is most definitely the closest I have ever come to being completely sick at anything I've ever dealt with as a mother!  Even the most poopy diaper hasn't compared.   (The 8th page is the one I'm talking about...)  Sooooo grooooosss!!!  The funny thing is the boys showed up and no one would ever have guessed we just had a minor crisis on our hands!  Yep, I definitely deserve the mother of the year award...had children drinking pee and a child eating poop like it was chocolate!  Nasty. 

By the way, before there is too much judging I challenge you to watch these two little handsome boys and see just how quickly they get into the naughty stuff!!!  They may be adorable, but they can be trouble!


This is one of my favorite pictures.  I love how snuggly they are to each other right now.